Ghost is real, too bad for me
rafa_angel
A lot of people (or rather most people) think that ghost is a myth, but for me, it is a real thing. But people never understand things that they can't see with their own eyes, right? Same here, I live in ignorance about the existence of ghost till 18. And I am annoyed and hateful toward people that can't understand because they don't go through it like me.

It started when my sister diagnosed with schizophrenia after she came home from abroad. But till now, I am still confused whether it is schizophrenia or ghost possession (or something like that). The strange things and supernatural things happened a lot in that period of time. Things flying, the bed shaking (I am serious!), invisible people (or ghost? ) choking my family when we slept, my sister sudden change in personality, and etc.

Ullambana, Kinda Overwhelming
rafa_angel
Short introduction of Ullambana

Ullambana, popularly known as the Festival of the Hungry Ghosts, is celebrated by Buddhists and Taoists in China, Korea, Japan, Singapapore and other countries. Following the Chinese Mahayana tradition, it falls on the fifteenth day of the seventh month of the lunar calender. The festival evolved from a Mahayana sutra called "Ullambana Sutra", supposed to have been delivered by the Buddha with reference to the suffering mother of the second chief disciple, Maha Moggallana (Mu Lian). "Ullambana" is a Sanskrit term which means "hanging upside down". Hence, it is commented that she was in purgatory undergoing the torment of being hung upside down. The Pali equivalent of the term is "Ullampana" which means "merciful disposition". Thus it depicts the sympathetic attitude to be cultivated towards the departed ones.



Today is my second time participated in ullambana ceremony. Actually, my family celebrated this festival every year, but I began participate after I became uni student.
Ullambana has been a pleasant, unique, and a great experience. To be honest, years ago I can't imagine myself as a person who believe in anything supernatural. Besides, the my sister illness, the most visible proof of the truth of Buddha teaching is this, because ullambana when celebrated correctly is kind of overwhelming, the first time I participated in this, tears welling up in my eyes. The second time, I burst into tears and cried uncontrollable, but what make it so strange is that I felt like I am not the one who crying, It is kind of far far away, hard to explain it. It make no sense that I am crying because what I am crying for? I never cry like that, because It was really really sad, and I am never that sad in my life, even in the lowest time. My eyes watered themself, and my face, mouth move by itself, but it is not to frightening, I am still concious of what is happening, It is just my body cried by themself and I thought "ohh, I am crying, so strange....It is not my sadness"

So It wasn't myself, don't know who that "person" is. But I hope the best for "that person".
May Buddha bless him ....

Don't Judge Me, Ever
rafa_angel

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I Wonder
rafa_angel
I suddenly get inspiration to write in this blog again after I stumbled to some interesting questions.

"I always find myself wondering, wondering about lots and lots and lots of thing. Am I always someone everyone says I am? Am I living my life enough? How will be my life be like after few years? Yet, this is not all I ever wondered about. I also wondered some random things."

~excerpt from Clarissa's blog

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Solitude in My Life & A Thought On Marriage
rafa_angel
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Best Friend, But Never Forever
rafa_angel

I admit that I am a hermit.

Solitude has always been important to me.


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You was precious to me as I was precious to you.

That is enough, as I know that nothing is eternal.

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The End
rafa_angel

About Kirio’s plastic surgery, he certainly had his face done. From his eyes to his jaws, it changed every years. He got almost all of his face done at 2009 (even J.Law said it in one of his post).


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Bitching again
rafa_angel


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(no subject)
rafa_angel

Gay are hard to Understand

My observation of them


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Ah.... Soap Opera...
rafa_angel
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The point is J.Law admit he do it and never deny it! So what! Kirio is so horrible, he even recorded this one!
I mean J.Law admitted even though kirio didn't have a clue, Didn't you think this has shown how much J.Law regret it?

This record didn't make me hate J.Law, it is the opposite!

While Kirio never regret what he did to J.Law. He always say I am being grateful. Where is there "gratefulness"? I don't see any.

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